I Lost My Daughter to the Culture of Death

Empty Cradle

This is the fifth contribution to the Intercollegiate Review symposium “Sex and the Polis: Perspectives on Marriage, Family, and Sexual Ethics.” 

It was two days before my seventeenth birthday, a Saturday morning, the day after a football game in which I’d played. So I was tired and sore, but I could smell breakfast coming from downstairs and somebody was walking up the stairs. I was half asleep. The door opened: it was my girlfriend, I smiled, of course—but from the look on her face I could see that this wasn’t called for. This was a serious moment. I steeled myself.

After a few long seconds, she looked up at me and said, “I’m pregnant.” That woke me up quick. We sat there in my bedroom, two young teenagers. My room was still a boy’s place, hung with football posters, sneakers, and baseball gloves strewn across the floor. But there I was, sitting next to my pregnant girlfriend. I knew all of a sudden I’d lost the right to keep on being just a boy. My girlfriend went to an all-girls Catholic school and looked ahead to college, while I was dreaming of college football and a career in the NFL. We each had a plan for our lives. It was time to scrap those plans.

We strategized together figuring out how to take care of the new life we created. It felt completely natural and, incomprehensibly, even a little exciting: Our adult lives were starting much sooner than we had planned, but we’d figure it out. So here’s what we decided: I could drop out of high school to join the army (a friend of mine had just done the same). My girlfriend would keep things secret, wear baggy sweaters and take vitamins until I got back from basic training and then we would be together—and I’d take care of all three of us.

So that’s what we did. I went to the recruiter’s office; I got the paperwork, which I needed my mother and my high school principal to sign. Now, out of five hundred and sixty-five students at Amos Alonzo Stagg High School, I was number five hundred and sixty-five. So my principal was quite happy to sign that piece of paper. My mother, with five kids, was also quick to sign the paper, with very few questions asked.

When I got to basic training, I didn’t go to church. I tried to once, but it was just too much for me to bear. In fact, I realized I’d rather do anything else. So I asked the drill sergeants, “When the rest of you guys go to church, can I stay back and clean something?” They agreed, so I took on pots and pans duty, which nobody wanted. I discovered that the station was right next to a freezer where the drill sergeants would hide ice cream bars. I realized that if I took those ice cream bars, packed them in buckets of ice, and snuck them upstairs, when the soldiers came back from church I could trade them. “You shine my shoes for a week? Okay, here’s an ice cream bar. You polish my brass for a week? Okay, here’s an ice cream bar. You make my bed….” And so skipping church turned out to mean that I didn’t have to polish my brass, shine my shoes, or make my bed. Not the best start for my moral education….

I was almost finished with basic and advanced infantry training and getting ready to graduate, and go home. I’ll never forget the day—it was a Sunday when I was cleaning pots and pans while everybody else was busy praying. A friend came running in and said, “Jones, your girlfriend’s on the phone and she’s crying.” So I ran out, knowing that I wasn’t supposed to leave my station or answer the phone. But I picked it up, and she was crying, as I have never heard a woman cry before. Ever. The only way that I can explain it is that her soul was crying. And she kept saying over and over and over again, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry. It wasn’t me.” And then her father said, “Jason,” over the other line, “I know your secret, and your secret’s gone. She had an abortion.”

“Call the Police, My Girlfriend’s Father Killed My Child.”

As soon as he’d said that word, a sergeant reached over my shoulder and hung up the phone. So I punched him. Another drill sergeant grabbed me, but he saw that I was crying, just saying over and over again, “He killed my baby! He killed my baby!” They pulled me into my captain’s office and threw me in a chair. At the sight of me falling apart like this, my captain—a big army ranger—looked pretty broken up himself. I managed to form some sentences: “Sir, call the police, my girlfriend’s father killed my child.” And he asked me to explain what happened. And as I did he looked confused and he said, “Private. Why would I call the police? Don’t you know that abortion is legal?” And you know, I didn’t.

Although I was just an E1 private making three hundred dollars a month I did know one thing—that human life began at fertilization. That information was not above my pay grade. And I knew that my child was a human being. My captain must have been pro-life, maybe a Christian, because he soberly and sympathetically gave me a Sparks Notes version of Roe v. Wade. Then he handed me a roll of quarters for the phone and said, “I want you to go to the PX; I can’t have you disturbing the whole battalion.” I walked to the PX, hearing again the sound of my girlfriend sobbing, feeling our loss in my gut. The thought of that baby had kept me going, every grueling day of basic training. My heart was broken.

And my mind was reeling. What really knocked the wind out of me, what was really incomprehensible, was that what had happened to my baby was perfectly legal. That wouldn’t sink into my head. It was too insane. I got to the payphone, and I called her back. We stayed on until every quarter ran out and the mechanical voice said, “You have sixty seconds. Please deposit more change.”

But I didn’t know what to say, because she was still crying. And so I said the only thing I could think of that might comfort her. And I meant it. I said, “I promise you, that even if no one else cares about abortion, and if it takes me the rest of my life, I will end abortion for our daughter Jessica” (we knew that our child was a girl because the abortionist said to my girlfriend afterward, “By the way, your baby was a little girl”). And I know now that no one person can defeat the Culture of Death. But I really meant it at seventeen, that I would through my own will end abortion. And I believed it.

When I got back to my duty station—I was stationed at Schofield Barracks, Hawaii—I figured out how to get started. I said, “I’m gonna start knocking on doors” (I knew the Mormons and the Jehovah’s Witnesses would knock on my mother’s door, and she would talk to them). Just off Schofield Barracks there was all this housing, full of Filipino immigrant farm workers. I would knock on their doors and the workers would open the door, “Haole, what do you want?” I was this skinny kid with a shaved head and ugly PX civilian clothes, and I’d say: “I wanna talk to you about abortion. Can we talk about abortion? Do you know it’s legal?”

And they’d look at me like I was crazy, but sometimes they’d pour me Coors Light in a cup with ice, and we’d talk. Sometimes they’d slam the door in my face, but most of the time they agreed with me that abortion was a horrible crime that must be stopped.

This was my plan! I would just knock on doors for the rest of my life on my off time. That’s all I could think of. Then one day I got an angry call to my barracks. This woman was mad. She demanded, “Are you the man going around neighborhoods saying you represent us?” She gave the name of her organization. I said, “No, Miss, I’ve never heard of you. I’ve never said I represent you.”

She said, “Well, yes, you are.” I responded, “Miss, I’ve never heard of you guys. How would I say I represent you? I’ve never heard of you.” She said, “You’re Jason Jones, right? You gave your number to so-and-so, right? And you’re going door to door talking to people about abortion.” I said, “Yes!” She said, “We’re Hawaii Right to Life, that’s what we do!” I stopped being defensive and was thrilled. “You mean there’s a group? There are more of us?”

You Can End Abortion in America

Before I got out of the army, one of my officers found out what I was doing. He’d heard rumors. He called me into his office, he said, “Private, I am hearing something very strange. I hear that in your off time sometimes you go around neighborhoods harassing civilians about abortion.” I said, “Yes, sir, I do that.” He said, “Are you crazy?” I said, “No, sir.” So I told him what I wanted to do—to end abortion in America.

He stared at me and thought for a moment and said, “Well you know as an officer I was taught that if we had a big goal we needed a big plan. You start with your goal and you work your way back, step by step. You need a plan. Go write a plan. This is a big thing you’re trying to do.”

So I went and I wrote this hugely ambitious plan. I brought it back to him, and I said, “There’s the plan, sir. This is how I’m gonna end abortion.” He said, “This is a good plan. Work the plan. Work the plan for the rest of your life and maybe you’ll achieve your goal.” When I got out of the army, I started to work the plan. And I have been working the plan ever since. Of course, God throws me plenty of curve balls, and the plan has to change to suit the political changes in our country. But everything I do, in every sphere of my life and career, is guided by the central purpose that I found at age 17, because of my lost daughter Jessica—promoting the incomparable worth of the human person.

I went to University of Hawaii, started the pro-life student group and became chairman of the Young Republicans. It was as a college student—still an atheist, a fan of Ayn Rand actually—that I discovered just how much courage it can take to defend the value of human life. The purveyors of the culture of death on campus—the most vocal being the aging faculty and abortion industry hucksters, refuse to acknowledge that you’re trying to defend the dignity and incomparable worth of the human person. The hippie reenactors will cast you as someone trying to ruin everyone’s fun—to turn “harmless” hook-ups into life-changing catastrophes. Your mission is to get them to understand that “hook ups” in dirty dorm rooms are not worth denigrating the dignity of the human person or denying transcendent moral values such as justice, love and compassion.

Now that I’m making movies in Hollywood, people come up to me and congratulate me for my courage. Do you know what I tell them? “Compared to a college campus, being pro-life in Hollywood is easy. You know who is courageous? Those pro-life student activists. They are the ones on the front lines.”

It is essential that pro-life young people stay bold and stay active. One thing to remember is that for every person who joins a student pro-life group or speaks up for our cause, there are at least 100, maybe 1,000 more who silently agree with us. This is true even on the college campus—but especially true in the rest of society (including your future bosses, co-workers, and potential spouses).

Social science bears this out. In 2012, the Gallup Poll found that only 41% of Americans identified themselves as “pro-choice,” while 50% said they were “pro-life.” Those are the best poll numbers that the pro-life position has had since Gallup started asking people this question in 1995, and the trend continues in our direction. The truth, that life is sacred, is graven in the human heart, and no lie can prevail against it forever.

I learned that lesson from reading one of the most powerful books I’ve ever come across, Pope John Paul II’s autobiographical Memory and Identity. It was the last book he wrote before he died. In it, that Pope wrote about the three great ideologies of evil that he faced in his life: Nazism, Communism, and the Culture of Death. And he pointed out that in his own lifetime, there was a point when Nazi ideology seemed unbeatable. The Nazis had conquered most of Europe, were menacing Britain, were rolling straight for Moscow, and starting up their machinery for exterminating their enemies. People who lived under Nazi occupation had every reason to think its power would last indefinitely. But in fact, that regime was destroyed after only 12 years in power. So much for the Thousand-Year Reich.

Next, the Pope pointed out how Communists, who did much of the fighting against the Nazis and then filled their shoes as conquerors and tyrants, looked absolutely unconquerable. Communism rolled over Eastern Europe, then conquered China, and exported its agents and its armies to every corner of the globe, arming itself with nuclear weapons that could wipe out the human race.

Then in 1989, the Communist colossus collapsed from within. It had been built upon a bedrock of lies about the human person, so human beings eventually rejected it. We were born to know the truth, and something in our soul is repulsed by lies. This awakening takes work and it takes time. But it is ultimately unstoppable.

Now a whole generation has grown up free in countries like Pope John Paul’s Poland—in time to face what the Pope called the third great evil of our century, the Culture of Death. It seems too deeply entrenched to be dislodged. Our culture’s elites embrace it as a gospel that can’t be questioned. Our government funds and promotes it, not just here but around the world—as the Soviets once pushed Communism. As I write this, the federal government, through the Obama administration’s HHS mandate, is threatening with closure any institution—religious or not—that will not comply with the Culture of Death by funding abortion-causing drugs in their employee health insurance plans.

The mission at hand can look challenging. But as Pope John Paul would remind us, they looked even grimmer in 1940, and again in 1948. And those two empires of lies came tumbling down. So will this one—if we make it our life’s work to share the dignity, beauty, and incomparable worth of the human person.

I understand now that I will never be able to keep that promise I made as a naive 17-year-old high school dropout to single handedly end abortion. But I do know that all of us working together will see in our lifetime a transformation of our culture in to a Culture of Life. That’s why I love the work that Students for Life of America does. They do what is absolutely necessary for this transformation. They inspire and train this generation of abortion abolitionists—the generation who survived abortion themselves but are now targeted by the abortion industry to destroy the next generation. Students for Life of America knows that college campuses are the Ground Zero for this transformation, and they are the only organization doing this critical work. It is an honor to stand beside them.

I know that if all of us commit our lives and resources to this, the greatest human rights cause of our age, we will see full legal protection for the human person, from the child in the womb to the child in her mother’s arms, from the embryo to the elderly, in our lifetime.

 

Jason Jones is a human rights activist, president of I Am Whole Life, Co-Executive Producer of Bella, Producer of Crescendo, and Associate Producer of The Stoning of Soraya M. This essay originally appeared in Courageous: Students Abolishing Abortion in This Lifetime, and is reprinted with the permission of Student for Life of America.

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  • Howard

    Nazism failed only after it had been seriously tried, and AS A DIRECT CONSEQUENCE brought serious suffering to the Germans. The Germans believed that they would win through merciless war, but merciless war turned against them. Soviet Communism failed only after it had been seriously tried, and AS A DIRECT CONSEQUENCE brought serious suffering to Soviet citizens. The Soviets thought that they would win through economics and the desires of the workers, but economics and the desires of the workers turned against them. Attempts to win either of these over by reason, though noble, were failures; only experience could destroy them. It will be the same with our Culture of Death.

    Since someone is sure to misinterpret what I was saying, let me be perfectly clear that I am NOT saying that we should make people suffer until they abandon the Culture of Death. I *am* saying that when we choose that culture, we choose suffering, and that it will be impossible for us to prevent that suffering, no matter how hard we try.

    The Reich no longer exists, and Germany today is only about 2/3 her pre-war size. The Soviet Union no longer exists, and Russia today is notably smaller than the Russian Empire had been. It’s a good thing that can’t happen to us — right?

    • LeticiaVelasquez

      If we have to suffer to overcome abortion, so be it. It is a worthy cause to suffer to overcome such a demonic evil. Surely God will give us the fortitude we need. He already gave us great leaders like Eduardo Verastegui, Jason Jones and Kristen Hawkins.

      • Howard

        I’m sorry, I did not mean to imply that suffering is optional. On the contrary, I am convinced that suffering is inevitable as the result of these sins — even if we were to repent today. My point instead was that we are unlikely to repent until after we have “drunk in full the cup of suffering”.

  • LeticiaVelasquez

    Absolutely riveting story which should be read by every college student and pro-life activist, until every college student IS a pro-life activist!!
    Sharing.

  • Leaven for the Loaf

    My trip to the March for Life in Washington last year was an extraordinary experience for me, as I saw so many young people – hundreds of thousands – assembling on the National Mall before the March. However entrenched abortion may be within government policy, the rising generation is more pro-life than their parents were. That’s good news.

  • nanaTo5

    Thank you so much, and I wonder, are you & the girlfriend still together? What did she do after the forced abortion? Did her dad ever come to regret what he did?

  • Elisabeth

    Thank you for your beautiful words. Your story is incredible–God bless you!

  • http://lizluyben.com/ elizabeth luyben

    Incredible story. Thank you, Jason Jones from the bottom of my heart for all that you do & all that you are. Life is beautiful.

  • Colleen Hammond

    Jason, what a riveting story of the power of one person with conviction! Also, the power of all of us working together. I can’t help but wonder…are you still with Jessica’s mother?

  • Erika

    1. It’s wrong that her father forced her to have an abortion. 2. That’s why it should be A WOMAN’S CHOICE – not anyone elses.

    • Elise77

      1. It is wrong that her father killed their baby.
      2. Only SHE should have had the option to kill their baby. Baby murdering should be A WOMAN’S CHOICE- not anyone else’s.

      There. Fixed it for ya.

      The bottom line is that whether she did it on her own or he forced her to, the result was the same: a dead baby. It wasn’t just tragic because the baby was wanted. It was tragic because the baby was ALIVE and had been KILLED. Because a tiny little girl was BUTCHERED. It was wrong because IT WAS WRONG.

    • Brandy Miller

      You are ignoring the other person in this story. It’s not just the woman that was affected, Erika. It’s Jason, it’s Jessica, it’s a whole world of people whose lives will never have a chance to be impacted the way that Jessica was intended to impact their lives. This isn’t just a woman’s choice to make. It shouldn’t be considered a choice at all.

      • NotOnMyWatch

        Thank you.

    • mcrognale

      Erika, you really are too stupid to comment on this subject. A woman’s ONLY choice is to NOT get pregnant. Abstinence is a perfect way but failing that you on the pill and he wears a condom.

      • Erika

        Calling someone stupid because you disagree with them is disrespectful – check yourself. As someone who apparently cares about the respect of all
        beings no matter how small the bundle of cells, you ought to know better.

        As a older white man I’m sure you have a lot of experience living as a woman complete with a uterus and the ability to bear children. A woman’s choice is to not get pregnant … Except that one woman or girl is raped every TWO MINUTES in the United States. What are the options for them? Do you support women’s shelters, education campaigns, domestic violence and rape prevention organizations? Do you advocate for the equality of women and teach boys to respect? If abortion upsets you, why not focus on the CAUSES of abortion rather
        than limiting a woman’s right to choose?

        On another level, what are the options for adults who don’t CHOOSE to “wait for marriage”, but grew up with terrible abstinence-only “sex education” so they know nothing about contraception or safe sex or consent or date rape or respectful sexual relationships? I keep seeing pro-abstinence stances from the pro-life supporters but it is SCIENTIFICALLY PROVEN that increasing access to contraception REDUCES UNWANTED PREGNANCIES therefore REDUCING ABORTION. Pro-lifers are on the wrong end of the fight – turn around and advocate for comprehensive sex ed and watch abortion rates fall. This system is
        broken. If Jason and his girlfriend has access and knowledge of free and easy contraception options, would they have gotten pregnant? NO, they would not, thus fixing this whole problem.

        I am not here to argue personhood. I am here to voice my (strongly backed up) opinion that if you truly wanted to end abortion, you should not be in front of Planned Parenthood waving signs at women who are most likely going in for mammograms. Instead you should be trying to ACTUALLY FIX THE PROBLEM with comprehensive sex ed, the elimination of rape, and support for women who are victims of domestic and sexual violence.

        “How I lost faith in the pro-life movement” – an article by a woman who was the president of her university’s Students for Life chapter:
        http://www.patheos.com/blogs/lovejoyfeminism/2012/10/how-i-lost-faith-in-the-pro-life-movement.html

        • leadsoldier

          Calling you stupid may not be wise; but at least it acknowledges your humanity and that your voice is being heard, and that you walk around and speak freely and live under the protection of the rule of law and cannot be arbitrarily detained or imprisoned or deprived of life without due process. You are alive. You have a voice. You can speak to all these people here and tell them how wrong and heartless they are, and go on speaking. Nobody here denies that you are a living, breathing human being with the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

        • OmaJohn

          I’m pro-Death as well. Me and Erika. When we can’t discuss the moral problems with consciously ending a human life in a mature, thoughtful way, we bring up vague statistics like using a massive sample of people, mixed with something misleading like the number of minutes between violent crimes, to justify our horrendous goal. We hate speaking honestly or sincerely, we prefer to mislead. This makes us better than you. Not to be sexist, but men don’t have an opinion and are incapable of standing up for what’s right, because there are more men in jail for violent crime offenses than women. It’s logic. Don’t try to argue.

        • JEH

          So you want to reduce abortion too? Cool! So, what’s the easiest way to not have an abortion? Don’t have an abortion!

          (Of course you have a response for that. I’m simply pointing out a very basic logical hole in your argument)

        • NotOnMyWatch

          I am a woman and I have enough dignity and self respect to understand that the choice is made when irresponsible people “hook up”.
          Intelligent, responsible people do not engage in activities whose outcome they can ill afford.

        • mcrognale

          I regret calling you stupid Erika. I apologize for that. The rest of my post stands. Merry Christmas.

  • mongupp

    Wow!

  • KMS

    God Bless you and your friends. I will pray for all of you every day!

  • Jeni

    “Social science bears this out. In 2012, the Gallup Poll found that only 41% of Americans identified themselves as “pro-choice,” while 50% said they were “pro-life.” Those are the best poll numbers that the pro-life position has had since Gallup started asking people this question in 1995, and the trend continues in our direction. The truth, that life is sacred, is graven in the human heart, and no lie can prevail against it forever.”

    HECK YEAH! Great story. This regime & holocaust too shall end.

  • Erika

    Written by a woman who was president of her university’s Students for Life chapter: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/lovejoyfeminism/2012/10/how-i-lost-faith-in-the-pro-life-movement.html

  • leadsoldier

    Wondering what happened to the girlfriend? Did you marry her? Keep in touch? Did you grieve this through together?

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  • JEH

    YOU ARE A CLUSTER OF CELLS TOO!!!
    As for viability, no human being is ever able to survive without the help of others! Are you implying that a newborn baby is not reliant on anyone but himself??? Would you put a newborn into a room and expect him to survive without help? Even an adult able to survive alone still relied on others for education and resources.

    You make 2 distinctions that DO NOT EXIST.

    “Right to bodily autonomy”? A child is not a part of a mother’s body, in or out of the womb. How do I know this? Just check both of their DNA! SCIENCE WOW!

    Further, science shows that human life begins at conception. The LEAST ARBITRARY point at which life begins is when the male and female cells combine. New DNA and most basic DEFINITION of a human being: male human + female human = new human.

    Beyond that all you’re doing is deciding how many cells a human being must have before you feel guilty about killing him.

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  • Ferdenan Damo

    Great story!!! Was the immigrant plantation housing Kunia Camp? My parents were plantation workers and we lived there from the late 1960s to the late 80s. Wife and I went to UH Manoa too. Again, awesome story I’ll definitely share.

  • llsb123

    Very well written, Med2. I agree with you and yes, I am also in the medical field and am a mother. The issue is very complicated, 3 dimensional and not one sided. The young man and his girlfriend were naive, ignorant of biology, ignorant of and inexperienced in life and in all honesty their families and their Church failed them, failed them long before she got pregnant and long before her dad “forced” her to have an abortion. I’m no fan of abortion but am well aware of how complicated parenthood and life is. Of course we all would like all babies who are conceived to be healthy, wanted, loved and cared for but that is NOT reality. We would also like all parents to be ready, willing and able to parent well but that isn’t reality either.

    • JEH

      Please explain to me why we aren’t going around killing every person who is not healthy, wanted, loved, and cared for.

      And your statements don’t even follow logically.
      You state that unhealthy, unwanted, unloved, and uncared for babies are simply a reality we must deal with. Yet you also imply that abortion is necessary to prevent unhealthy, unwanted, unloved, and uncared for babies.

  • NotOnMyWatch

    You aren’t very bright. Guns save lives. This is a fact. Also, more lives are lost to abortion than ALL wars combined.
    You advocate subsidizing irresponsible behavior, which only begets more of the same.
    You don’t really care about your fellow man. You merely want to seem intelligent. Good intentions trump results in your naive, self-involved world. Just be honest

  • homesickyank

    Jason, this father had his daughter’s future to think of. You were both children yourselves. What kind of future do you think you two could have built? Be realistic. I think that dad did you both a favor. By the way, you didn’t use a condom when you had sex, you wouldn’t have had to go through all this anguish if you had been responsible in the first place.

    • JEH

      Life is not about comfortable, successful, convenient living. Life is about… er… life I think. We are alive not for ourselves but for those around us. And for a lot of women, for those *in* us.

      But you’re right, killing people who are a burden to others is doing a favor for them. That’s why we kill old, sick people, right? There are plenty of “ethicists” who argue that some humans have less value than others, and that killing young children can be justified to based on their value to society and the people around them.

  • homesickyank

    And I find it interesting, Jason, that you joined raithe military – hello, it’s purpose is to train young people for war (last time I checked the dictionary it means ARMED conflict where people fight to the death), and then you write about someone murdering your unborn child. A bit of a paradox there.

    • JEH

      Might want to recheck your dictionary. War is simply armed conflict. War is not killing people for fun. The only way you can even justify war is the protection of life or liberty, and often liberty leads to saved life.

  • JEH

    Republicans usually argue that charity is most effective at the level of neighbor, not national government. But if everyone knows that the government is going to magically take care of everyone, why bother helping out your neighbor?

  • JEH

    Also, you do know that the goal of the military is to save lives? I’m not denying our own military can be and has been and is in various ways not living up to that goal, but protecting life is the core goal of a nation’s military. Yes, an emphasis is put on domestic life, but a proper military seeks to save the lives of all if possible.

  • JEH

    Calling abortion murder is not taking a woman’s choice away. If a woman got pregnant and it didn’t involve rape or incest, then she already MADE A CHOICE. She has the choice to have sex or not.

    If rape or incest is involved, then of course she is a victim, and she should be treated as such. No one chooses rape or asks for it. Even if poor decisions were made that led to rape, she is STILL a victim. Rape is a horrible crime and no blame should be placed on the victim.
    But since when are victims of crimes allowed to kill OTHER victims??? The child conceived through rape is a victim too! That child is conceived in a mother who may not be able to support him! Pregnancy-causing rape has 2 victims, not just 1! That just makes it a worse crime. Obviously the punishment for the rapist should be extremely high. But how is it justified for the older victim to kill the younger, weaker, more dependent victim???

    “Scared, upset, and possibly trapped”
    Yes, this is tragic. Women in these situations need support, NOT abortions!

    • Choices95

      It is taking away a viable medical option from women who may need it, for whatever reason- sometimes, people have medical conditions that prevent safe pregnancies. Should they stay abstinent their whole lives? The simple fact is that abstinence-only policies and education create more unwanted pregnancies and more abortions than teaching people how to safely have sex. Let’s start with that, shall we?

      “Poor decisions were made that led to rape”? Perpetuating rape culture doesn’t feed your argument. But moving on, you are undermining your own argument; by admitting that the rape victim may not be able to support her baby, you are not allowing her a way out of the situation. “Adoption”, you say, “is the proper answer.” How about the medical bills for a woman who is underinsured or uninsured, and who cannot find an adoptive family? What about women in cultures that are repressive towards unmarried sex and would end up killing her and her unborn child? What about the horrible struggle of being forced to carry the baby of a rapist to term, reminding you of your trauma?

      Sometimes they have no support. Donate to women’s shelters, talk to the women who have gone through this, and then get back to me.

      • JEH

        “Perpetuating rape culture doesn’t feed your argument.” You did not understand the context of my statement. I prefaced it with “even if”, and I made it clear that nothing, no matter what, makes the woman NOT a victim. How is affirming that the woman would ALWAYS be a victim “perpetuating rape culture”????

        “sometimes, people have medical conditions that prevent safe pregnancies. Should they stay abstinent their whole lives? The simple fact is that abstinence-only policies and education create more unwanted pregnancies and more abortions than teaching people how to safely have sex.”

        The simple fact is that I never said anything about abstinence in my comment. If a pregnancy is threatening the life of the mother, then obviously the better result is 1 dead person instead of 2 dead people.

        Your statements about medical bills and such make it difficult for the two of us to communicate on the same level at all. I honestly don’t really know how to argue with someone who believes murder is preferable to high medical bills.

  • JEH

    First: if you argue that truth has anything to do with popularity, you’ll find yourself in a hot mess soon enough.

    Second: if his girlfriend just so happened to -choose- abortion, then your whole argument falls apart. Jason could still have had the same story to tell and you wouldn’t be able to say that.

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  • JEH

    Why is this bullshit argument still being peddled? Overpopulation is never going to be an issue. Chances are the world population will be decreasing within this century anyway. The issue is not too many humans. The issue is poor distribution of resources. More humans allow more resources to be produced.

  • JEH

    Advising couples to consider their current situation before having children is great, but advising that a couple should kill their child because they will suffer more than planned is nonsense.

    I simply don’t understand the argument for abortion based on an uncomfortable life. It’s the same as advising all poor people to kill their children because they won’t have the luxury of owning an iPhone.

    We’re getting to the point where it’s quite popular to value pleasure over life itself. An uncomfortable life is apparently not worth living.

  • JEH

    You are justifying death by claiming that it reduces suffering and hardship. Death is our enemy. Death is not just a part of life.

    If you truly advocate the killing of all pre-born children who might be born into less than perfect families, then you should be advocating the killing of nearly everyone on the planet.

    Is pleasure more valuable than life itself? Does suffering and hardship make a life worthless?

    No one is judging a sexual abuse victim by asking her not to have an abortion. She’s a victim with another victim inside her. Killing the younger, weaker, more dependent victim makes no sense. That won’t ease the suffering of a sexual abuse victim unless she has been lied to about what abortion actually is.

  • JEH

    I have no interest in justifying any questionable actions made by the United States military. However, to claim that a military must necessarily have a culture of death is silly. The point of a military is to protect life and liberty. The point of war is not to kill for the sake of killing or to advance the cause of death in any way.

    I’m fine with questioning a military’s actions, but you never told us about this society of life you had in mind. If it makes you feel any better, it’s hard to imagine that the things Jason did in Hawaii advanced the things you specifically called out.

  • Choices95

    I don’t flatter myself or believe that any of us are on the proverbial high road, this is an online forum, and an impolite on at that. First of all, I’d like for you to leave God out of this. Everyone has different religious beliefs and while you may believe that God supports yours, he’d probably prefer that you support your beliefs by volunteering at a homeless shelter rather than sitting and trashing my beliefs. If you’d like to talk about a slippery slope, isn’t all life important, including animals? How about the meat that you eat, which was probably farmed in South America, wiping out entire ecosystems that might have someday cured cancer? What about that tiny ant you stepped on yesterday? I think that we all should be fighting the big battles rather than bickering over a small pile of cells that could have been grown in a petri dish.

    • JEH

      “I’d like for you to leave God out of this.”
      “[God]‘d probably prefer that you support your beliefs rather than sitting and trashing my beliefs.”

      Do you not see anything illogical about the above string of statements? Nothing contradictory?
      Please, oh please do not claim that you are the victim here. It’s called an argument, the whole point is that 2 sides are in conflict.

  • Choices 95

    There is a huge difference between a fetus in the first trimester and a baby. That’s like comparing a branch to a tree. Chances are, if the mother cannot take care of that baby its quality of life would be terrible anyway, which is another choice that ‘baby’ did not make. You are not giving the baby a choice either way, why not let the mother choose? She can make medical decisions for him/her until the age of 18, it is obvious that this should start in the womb. I am also a proponent of doctor-assisted suicide, and I think if you can spare many people pain and suffering you should do it. There are legitimate medical reasons for abortion as well, so assuming that all of the women getting abortions were simply stupid and don’t want to face the consequences is unfeeling and rather judgmental.

    • JEH

      Comparing a human to a tree is like comparing a tree to a rock.

      “I am also a proponent of doctor-assisted suicide, and I think if you can spare many people pain and suffering you should do it.”

      Once again, I find this position non-sensical. You are, by definition, pro-death. Death is preferable to a perceived lack of pleasure. The problem here, is that life IS painful and EVERYONE suffers. Our job as living people is to care for our suffering neighbors who are in pain. NOT KILL THEM!

      “assuming that all of the women getting abortions were simply stupid and don’t want to face the consequences is unfeeling and rather judgmental.”

      I’m not even discussing the *reasons*. I’m arguing against abortion *period*, regardless of reason. One could be stupid or smart and I’d still argue that killing a baby is not a good thing to do.

  • Abortion isnt that bad

    i think the father did right, you guys are too young and can’t support yourselves yet, it’s no time to have a baby.
    You can’t force someone to abort, did her father threaten her to take away her laptop or something??

    You’re overreacting and acting like the lunatic you are.

    • JEH

      You’re right, every pro-life person I’ve met so far has been a lunatic. Abortion isn’t that bad. I mean, I once met a young couple who had a 8 month old daughter, and they clearly didn’t have the finances to support their daughter. They seemed like lunatics as well. I suggested that they cut their daughter’s head open and vacuum out her brain so no one would have to suffer financial instability.

      Their response? They got all upset and said that would be murder. It was silly though, they were just overreacting.

  • JEH

    “Calling these women murderers shows an incredible lack of respect for other views and cultures. ”
    So the views of Cyberguy64 do not warrant respect?

    Fighting world hunger does not preclude one from fighting abortion.

  • JEH

    Haha yeah I know it’s pretty humorous. These pro-life people only write propaganda. As a pro-choice person, I am grateful that pro-choice individuals never write propaganda.

  • JEH

    I’m not sure I agree with every detail Howard has said, but he was never arguing that we shouldn’t be fighting against suffering.

  • JEH

    “I respect all of the opinions presented here. None are more or less valuable simply because they align (or do not align) with mine.”

    “Being a Republican and being pro-life makes no sense”

    Please tell me, is the opinion in that 2nd statement less valuable than your opinion?

  • Starr

    You learned a hard lesson at an early age and I hope you made the decision to be not only an activist, but someone who is a good role model. That means education of some sort and a good work ethic. You need to be aware of the language you use, and your own morals..
    There are many factors that come into this discussion and I don’t think you can make a decision on outlawing abortion unless you are willing to discuss birth control as well. I realize this is a religious site, and many on here have made the decision to wait until they are married for sex. Unfortunately, not every teenager is as well prepared as that.
    Life on the streets is hard, especially if you come from any kind of abusive situation. Sometimes for those kids, affection from any source is so absent from their lives that no matter what direction it takes, its welcome.
    I would encourage you to reach out to those kids and be realistic. Promises made to forego premarital sex do not mean much if you’re hungry and need shelter. Drugs, of course, can be a contributing factor as well.
    I personally, would rather a teenager have access to birth control, then bring another little life into a hellish existence.
    My daughter works with these inner-city kids and see’s the terrible lives many of them have. Homes with no food or heat, rodents running across the floor, stained mattresses with no sheets, Mom’s with multiple partners, drugs, dirty houses, dirty children, and lots and lots of despair. No child deserves this.
    Until we learn to value life, we must do something to try and stop this. I agree abortion is murder and isn’t the answer, but birth control and education is.

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